Alternative Ways of Knowing Pt. 12

Surrender To Know Pt. 2

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a performance anxiety

Alternative Ways of Knowing Pt. 12

April 19, 2016
Bill Haberman
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See previous parts for important information.

Surrender To Know Pt. 2

 

… continued…

I practice, not as much as I should, a form of qigong type exercise called “just standing”.  I base my new system on the ideas from Felicitas Goodman, runes, and qigong and more.  With that you can open for health, healing, emotional balance, and doors of manifestation all your energy channels by just knowingly standing.  It is tentatively called Texas Standing Spirit Bear [TSSB].  

 

TSSB is what the Japanese parallel system name says “just standing”.   Some of the masters of this ancient exercise style, in the east, will just stand for hours.    

standing

But do this for five minutes once or twice a day for a few days or a couple of weeks, and you will see amazing things as your energy channels open.  [Warning if you stand for a long time in the wrong way you will perpetuate or exacerbate issues, disease, pain, emotional issues.  How you stand affects the way you are.]

 

I hope someday to teach TSSB.  I know it will improve health and spirituality.

 

I am not here giving all the details of TSSB, because we are focused on surrender.  One of the aspects of this new system, maybe the main one, is surrender.   

 

I was having some issues with standing correctly.  I tried and tried to force myself through into correct posture.  But I found that the problems were not being handled and/or getting worse and causing me more problems.  I understood what I was supposed to do, but I was not getting closer to my goal [ego] of getting there.  I wanted to do it right, yesterday.  

 

runner

 

My goal had become the end product and not the journey.  I tried harder and things were going in the wrong direction.  The problem was I was thinking that the goal was to stand correctly.  I needed to change the goal to being in the journey to where I stood correctly.

 

For example, I noticed that as I tried to reach the goal of standing correctly, my breathing was not correct.  It had in the effort to stand right become shallow.   When you shallow breath, the oxygen that your blood received in the lungs binds to the hemoglobin too tightly and has a hard time releasing into the cells, starving the cells for oxygen.  [There are other issues too.]

 

In my struggle to stand right I could not breath right even when I realized that I was breathing incorrectly.  I could not do deep breathing.   As I was failing to breath right and in ego struggled with the goal to correct that, I found myself tensing up the diaphragm mussels and mussels in other parts of my body.  My goal of standing correctly was making me worse off.  I did not know what to do.

 

I was talking to a friend who had been having some depression problems.  

depression

 

She was elated in her story.  One night in the throes of depression, she just said to herself, “You know I really kind of like feeling this way. Thank you.”   She stopped fighting [ego] the depression and just surrendered to it.  It almost instantly melted away.  

 

Her goal had been to be depression free.  In surrendering she started looking at what she liked about where she was at.  She dropped the ego control mind, the doing mind, and turned on the being mind in the reality of where she was as opposed to where she wanted to be.  And that made all the difference.

 

Dr. Wayne Dyer had a saying, “What you resist persists.”

 

dyer

 

When we finished our phone conversation, I did some TSSB.  I was aware what standing correctly was and that I was not doing it.  I just surrendered.  I thanked my body for pointing that out to me.  

 

I just surrendered and imagined standing correctly.  I was not egoic fighting my bad posture or trying.  I was just thankfully looking at what it was.  I started being in the now realty of standing, just standing.  I noticed to my surprise that I could and was deep breathing.   Then I started imagining how I would be when I was standing correctly.  The blocks that I had had in moving to a more correct standing session melted away.  

 

How did I know how to do this?  I stopped trying; I stopped fighting; I surrendered.  I was surrendering to know how to move toward correct standing.  

 

Am I perfect at this; am I a master.  That is ego thinking.  It is not the point and counter productive to think about it.  

 

One Oriental master of standing was ask about being a master.  He said, “When I find a man who can stand correctly, I will be his disciple.”   If you want to know, it is not the ego goal.  It is surrender.  Once you learn how to surrender, you do not need to do session standing any more.  You just live in surrender and you will know.  

 

The act of sex also is an example of knowing through surrender.  Yes, now that the snickering has stopped there is a spiritual knowing part of sex that most miss.  Male and female sex has become an ego fest.

 

There is a problem called performance anxiety.  

a performance anxiety

 

When you have it, you do not know how to conquer that problem.  Take a pill?  No there is a spiritual solution of surrender.  You can surrender to know.

 

This happens mostly with men, but it can also happen with women.  The person is worried that they will not be good at it or that he/she will not satisfy the other person.  That is a goal ego issue that can be solved by surrender.  [Some try so hard that they end up in perversion.]

 

I heard of a man who was getting married.  He had performance anxiety about the wedding night.  This was back in the 1940’s he was a virgin, and the bride was a widow.   He was worried that he would not be comparatively good enough to satisfy her.  

 

The proper advice for him was surrender and know.  Dismiss the ego goal and make the goal the journey.  The journey will provide all the knowledge that you need if you just surrender.

 

What is happening is that the person is goal [ego] focused.  There is a focus on getting it done, whatever part of the act is their particular goal.  Let us say that the woman wants to make sure that the man orgasms, or visa versa.  They are determined to get the job done, for themselves or the other person.  That does not sound romantic, but at its base that is what is going on in the ego mind related to sex.  

 

However if the person surrenders the ego goal and becomes a human being and not a human doing sex, the journey to the end is so much more filled with the imparting of sacred knowingness.  There can be no performance anxiety.  There is nothing to be anxious about.  It is the beautiful journey that is the goal wherever it may end.  

 

We are not just talking about foreplay; sometimes foreplay is the egoic goal.  To the contrary, it is you just moving into surrender with total spontaneity and take the time to appreciate the journey.  It is there that you will reach the knowledge of the journey.  There is the place of spiritual sex, the knowingness of surrender.  

 

When someone loves sex, he is an egotist.  When he surrenders to the journey, he is not a human doing, rather a human being.   

 

So it can be with all of your life.  
Surrender is an alternative way of knowing.

 

 

About The Author

Dr. Bill in San Antonio, TX, holds six degrees in religious studies including a Ph.D. and a Th.D. He holds several other certificates and certifications. He has been what some call a professional student. Raised mostly in rural south and south-central Texas, he is equally at ease on the ranch, in the woods, in meditation, or metaphysical pursuits. He was the author of two books now out of print and several that he has not pushed for publication. He has written numerous articles in pier review journals during his time in traditional ministry. He was invited to be on the translation committee for a modern Bible translation but declined, for philosophic differences over translation presuppositions. His studies in comparative religions led him into an in depth study of metaphysics. He has a knack for noticing overlapping principles in different systems. It occurred to him that when things keep showing up in many religions that these maybe the secret truth past down from our ancient past that are applicable to us today. As in folk lore Odin hung from the tree upside down and after nine days, came to know the secret runes. Today Dr. Bill strives to look at repeating truths in a different way. He is willing as needed to take the time to see the secrets that are ready to be opened from different directional considerations. Dr. Bill was a traditional minister for 25 years, filling pulpits two times a week and teaching many classes. Now he has centered his work on the metaphysical of spirituality. Dr. Bill looks at the metaphysical and spiritual from a new eclectic perspective. This rare insight has been a boon to him and as he works to help you can be a boon to you amazon.com/author/billhaberman
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